Healing

Having things that remind me of Will, making traditions that include Will, and helping others is a part of my grieving and healing process. I absolutely love going into Hobby Lobby because they always have pinwheels. That is our thing that reminds us of Will. I seriously smile going down the aisles and thank God while I am in the aisles for the little things that He gives me that remind me of Will. Christmas and Will's first birthday were a little easier because we started some traditions and I know I will look forward to those traditions every year. 

And now we have started something that I hope will turn into more. As I had said in an earlier post we asked family and friends to bring donations (hats, booties, blankets, outfits) to honor Will for his first birthday. Well two weeks ago we took those donations to the hospital where we had Will. They had asked me to wash all of the items, so I did that and tried to put them into complete sets (outfit, blanket, and hat or booties). I wanted to make sure they stayed together, so I wrapped them in ribbon and labeled them using some precious paper that a sweet friend gave us shortly after Will died. 

I had been talking to a nurse manager at the hospital on the phone for a few weeks about what we wanted to do, so we set a date and we headed to the hospital for the first time since we had said goodbye to Will. I was so nervous to go back. As we were parking in the parking garage my thoughts flooded back to how I felt when I left the hospital empty handed. As soon as we walked in I was fine and I was just excited to hand over the items. We also had brought cookies, a veggie tray, and fruit for the nurses to say thank you for all they did for us and for other families. 

Debbie, the nurse manager came to meet us and after talking for a while we were able to go to two of the wings we stayed. Jess pointed to the rooms where we stayed, but I could not remember. It just so happens that my favorite doctor (maternal fetal specialist) was on the wing, so we got to speak to him! We have so much respect for him and are so thankful for everything he did for us, so it was so wonderful to be able to thank him again a year later. We then headed to the labor and delivery wing and were able to deliver the snacks and donations personally to the nurses. We were also able to talk to a few other people about ways we could help out and possibly get a few things started. They all seemed so excited, so that of course made me excited! I am looking forward to what could get started. 

This was such a healing time for us to go the hospital (Canon was also with us)! Jess and I both were pleasantly surprised about how much time everyone spent with us and the reaction we were given. I felt very validated and that means so much to grieving parents.

Most of the donations before they were packed up. 

We hope to do this every year on Will's birthday.